Happy 17

You may say I’m a dreamer
But I’m not the only one
I hope someday you can join us

Đến bây giờ mới có thời gian viết cái note này. Qua sinh nhật 2 ngày mất rồi, nhưng thôi chẳng sao cả.

17 rồi đấy Thảo ạ, phải lớn lên, trưởng thành lên, mạnh mẽ lên nhé! Phải vững vàng trước mọi sóng gió, phải bình thản tiếp nhận chông gai và lì lợm đối đầu với nó, nghen!

17 tuổi, tự chúc bản thân mãi nhí nhố, hồn nhiên và mơ mộng thế này. Lớn lên đáng sợ lắm, nhưng chẳng ai bé mãi cả. Nên chỉ dám mong mình sẽ quật cường, không bị thay đổi thôi.

Bản thân lúc nào cũng nhỏ bé, luôn lo sợ này kia. Nên tự hi vọng sẽ luôn được yêu thương, an nhiên, ủ yên. Mong sẽ luôn được mọi người quan tâm, lo lắng và thương yêu. Yêu và được yêu là ước mơ cơ bản của con người.

Chúc bản thân luôn gặp nhiều may mắn, luôn tươi cười rạng rỡ, chúc cho những cảm xúc tiêu cực tìm được một chỗ ngủ thật ấm áp ở đâu đó và ngủ quên luôn, không thèm dậy nữa.

Vậy thôi, chúc tuổi 17 thật đẹp!

The Book Thief [Review]

First of all, I have to tell you that I am a very absent-minded person, so I will take notes very carefully about this day. Today is Saturday, Dec 6th, 3 days ahead of my birthday and 4 days before the first semester examination takes place.

Now, here comes the review on the film.

It has been such a long time since I was last engrossed in a film. What a film! I was about to turn off the tv when I came across the film. Tonight is the premiere on Star Movies, and I remembered having read about the book, so I decided to watch. And from the moment I sit down till the moment the word “The end” appeared, I didn’t move, not even a centimetre. I was at a loss of words, and I felt like I have been through a journey with all the actors, actresses, though I did not watch from the beginning.

Closing my eyes, I can still remembered the voice, the scenes, the ups and downs. Liesel, Rudy, Hans, Rosa, Max, Mr Steiner, Franz,… The film reminds that we all live under someone, like in this film, Hitler. When it comes to war, when people chase after the thing they call “ideal”, humanity does not have a place in this world. Hans was pushed for that reason. He reminded us of humanity. He told the German officer that the Jewish man was always a good neighbor. Then he got hurt.

This film, or can I say, the story, is flawless. It shows us war, friendship, humanity, family, or even love. The relationship between Liesel and Rudy is close friends, and they like each other. Their friendship is pure, and so is their love, though it is never spoken. What hurt me the most is the Death did not let Rudy finish his sentence. He did not not get the life he wanted : to grow up before he died, so at least he should have had the chance to express his love. The kiss came too late. This scene had my tears.

Or I remember that my hear did skip a beat when I thought the mean boy Franz knew something about Liesel’s secret, or he would determine to find out. Or my sorrow at the end of the film, when no alarms went off, and all died. War means no exceptions. I have clearly understood this. No one lives forever, but they deserves to die after a full life, not like this. Hans came home after war, but passed away in this way. Is it fair? No, life is unfair, and we continue to live. Like Liesel. She did continue and move on.

After seeing the movie, something inside keeps telling me, insisting that I write. And I follow my heart. Just like Max said to Liesel:

“Write. In my religion we’re taught that every living thing, every leaf, every bird, is only alive because it contains the secret word for life. That’s the only difference between us and a lump of clay. A word. Words are life, Liesel.”

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24Oct2014

Heart says: If you love him, let him go. Once he comes back, he’ll be yours forever

Em ước mình là nước
Mềm mại và dịu êm
Như đại dương bao la
Xanh biếc ôm lấy anh

Em ước mình là gió
Tự do và mạnh mẽ
Lôi cuốn màu bàng bạc
Chạm nhẹ vào môi anh

Như màu tím pha lê
Như màu hồng ngọc bích
Tình em vẫn luôn vậy
Yêu anh hướng về anh

Em vẫn nhớ như in
Nụ cười anh ngày ấy
Trong vắt màu của nắng
Của trời và của mây

Nhưng nào đâu cho em
Nụ cười tình cảm ấy
Tím ngắt và đỏ tươi
Là tất cả em thấy

Nhưng anh à em biết
Rồi cũng sẽ qua đi
Tình cảm sẽ nhạt mất
Trả lại em ngày trước
Một màu trắng tinh khôi

Em không buồn không đau
Cũng chẳng rơi nước mắt
Vì yêu nên em sẽ
Luôn luôn dõi theo anh

Em ước mình là đất
Hiền hoà và lặng lẽ
Nuôi dưỡng bí mật nhỏ
Tình cảm thầm kín này

Mai sau này từ đất
Sẽ có một bông hoa
Nở ra bông hoa hát
Anh à em yêu anh.

Ảnh: WeHeartIt

My little secret

When I was 6 years old, just a little girl, something did happen to me. Something big, really big. Little did I realize that this thing will affect my whole life, including my lifestyle and way of thinking. Only now do I have the courage to look back and accept it.

It’s been 11 years and I’ve grown up. But the memories never fade away.

I can tell you that what I want the most is getting married and what I’m afraid the most is also marriage. I deeply want to give away my love, sacrifice my heart. But still, I am horrified to be hurt, to receive things I don’t expect.

Long time ago, I read an article and found that this was normal for those like me.

The truth is, I don’t feel safe. Never. I always am nervous…

Love and be loved, care and be cared,… I have been thinking about them all the time. This is what I want the most, and will always be.

Lately I always feel bad, pessimistic. I lost interest in things. I hate going outside and communicating. I just talk to the ones I feel safe with. I don’t really understand myself, one moment I can be as happy, but the next moment I can be sad as hell. This week I cut myself, not to commit suicide, but to free myself a little bit. I think I am having a depression.